I’ll tell you what’s in mine! It’s not complicated, yet people make it difficult! My maiden name was a simple 3 -syllable English name Call-a-way. Loved it ! alas, we were NOT related to the rich Callaways; of Callaway Gardens and Callaway golf! Ski resorts in Colorado? How did that happen??? Hmmm? [ We were the ordinary Callaways]. People always asked us if we were part of those families? Nope. There was a tv show called ‘Those Calloways’, a 1965 Disney film, then a tv show. My name for 27 years was Carol Callaway, sounds alliterative, doesn’t it? Could not stand it when people put an O in there...Calloway. That’s not our way ! Although Cab Calloway surely made a name for himself! Anyone who knows me, knows that I am not vain. However, I am a little vain about my name; just want it to be said correctly. Thus...imagine the obstacles when I married a Greek, and I acquired a 4-syllable surname. it’s such an easy name, not complex like some of the Greek names 4-5-6 syllables ! I was proud of myself when I could pronounce those hefty names with ease, and sound like a local! Hence, Veliotis is a lovely name, and I think of some Spanish-Greek origin? It’s a little different from most Greek names, but I like it. When I married my Greek husband in 1974, we were here visiting my parents, when war broke out in Greece, and if we flew there, he would have been conscripted for 3 years. His father called and dictated ‘STAY THERE’ until this war is over. So, we did, and had a quickie ceremony at the Newton County courthouse, with only a few days to plan the wedding. My cousin from Chattanooga was at the wedding, and she wrote the most amazing toast, based on Keats 1819 poem “Ode to a Grecian urn”. Her romantic poem was “For a Grecian she yearned”, describing our courtship and marriage. Unforgettable…unique ! 12 years later when I divorced him, she surmised “that last name you inherited…awesome for an artist. It was the best thing he ever gave you !”( besides 2 kids). Actually, in Greece the surname is declined. The man/husband is Veliotis, the wife/woman is Velioti, and the children/offspring are Veliotopoula ( the ‘little birds’ of ). Thus, I was Karol Velioti. Plus, because of 400 years of Turkish domination, everybody had nicknames, passed down for generations. [Mine was Vra-hos = strong faithful rock]. It was a secret network of solidarity to evade Turkish spies. I had several friends with 5 and 6 syllable names, which really trips your tongue up, trying to pronounce them, but I learned. Veliotis is pronounced exactly as it is spelled ...[Veh-lee-oh-tis]. When I returned to Georgia, and was teaching art, I simplified it for the students, Ms.V, and to this day, some of my former students still call me miz v. In the 40 years I have lived back here since leaving Greece, I have kept a journal of every single way in which my surname has been botched up. Sometimes I would be paged in a store, and it was so distorted that I did not even recognize it, until I surmised ...maybe that’s me they are paging? Now...bear with me, as I am documenting SOME examples, a few with footnotes. Velarchos, Veltoellis, Veliofis, Veleevlis, Vellitts, Zeliogis, Valleosis, Velachoris, Veiotis, Velatoris, Mr.Carl Belloetis ( yep..Mr.Carl) Veloctic, Neliotis, Veltose, Velilotis, Veloshees, Veolattis (my college), Lioto, Vellateeze (on a trapeze), Valiendios, Volatis, Veliotise, Veliolis, Velioytis, Viliotis, Volteese ( electrical?) Veliotid, Veolettise, Velatwa, Velliolis, Vekliotis, Vantalus (at the hospital), Vellietose, Velkiotis, Valiodoius, Velostes, Veliotisn, Votissimo, Uiliestis, Veriodis, Vealattis, Vellotix, Upviotis, Velions, Vellotas, Carolyn Veletchis (watch out for her!) Velato (thinking gelato?) Velittos,(Fritos?) Vandalosis (a vandal with halitosis?) Veatolis, VelliEYE-tis, Melliotis, Verteotis, Velassatus, Vee-eye-otis, Vellieyeotis, Veloitis, Vigliotta, Veriotitis, Veloris, Velds (welds?), Veliltis, Verdis, Veltisus, Velteelus, Veryotis, Violittis, Vilaotis, Viliotis, Velotia, Williotis, Veolotis, Veeololas, (by a local official), Harold (for Carol) Veolotus, Velsist, Velatois (French?) Veolatus, Voliotis, Leiotis, Veleotis, Velatose, Deliosoic, Vellytis, Veilotis, Veliotix, Velilytis, Veleodus, Veluftos, Veloats,(baby goats?) Veliopis(an eye condition?), Taleo, Viatolis, Velladose, Vitiolis, Veriotis, Vealittus, Verabotis, Velistes, Veliosis, Veliatti, (Italian?) Velentose, Velialis, Carlos Veleetos (he likes Cheetos?), Veellatta, Carl Violets ( a new species?), Velodios, Vileotis, Veldose, Veliotism( a school of thought?), Vedotis, and...you won’t believe it… another 200 ways! filling up pages in my address book, and post-its, too. A few stand-outs…Liviotis, Caril Valiotis, Carol (correct !) Victopia, Vulneotis, Valettros, Zelitoes, Vehlovteeus, Vellarotis, Veladivis, Davelotta, Velasco, Veladivis, Steve ( Carl left?) Vellottis, Velatittis, Velsot, Deliosi, Veyowdis. Yowza! My eyes are crossing, and spellcheck is going nuts ! All 127 underlined in red for spelling. I am Not making this up! Sometimes when people are trying to pronounce it, they hesitantly try, and when they butcher it, I say “WAIT,…LET ME WRITE THAT DOWN.” “Why?” I have to explain that I am keeping a ledger. I say, “it’s pronounced just like it’s spelled”, then they sound it out correctly. Once in a blue moon, someone gets it right on the first try, a rarity! I always thank them, then say I have 300 different ways it has been MISPRONOUNCED. No one believes me ! Sometimes…let’s say...at a hospital or large medical office, a tech will come to the waiting room with a chart in their hand, and attempt to say Veliotis. They stumble once or twice, give up ...and just call out ‘Carol’. That’s me…Carol V!